Fresh Nova Scotia Saturday CFB LOX!

Bingo!!!!! It's that time of the year again, folks! Who's hungry!?! Who's horny!?! I know I am! Thursday night was just the tip of my titanic dick, and tomorrow is the entree! Tomorrow is when winners are picked, and losers get clipped! I don't give a fuck! I'll stick my fuckin elbow down your throat, snowplow your mother, and call it a romance! Gimme a break already! Enough is enough! Fuck Hurricane Earl, more like Hurricane Vagina if you ask me! This is the fuckin northeast, not the Flemish Fuckin Cap! How about them Miami Hurricanes, bitch! I'm in MIAMI BITCH!!! They pounded FAMU, similar to the way I pound Jagermeister for fuckin breakfast, while I use a page out of the NY Post for my napkin! How about those fuckin Utah Utes making Dave Wannstedt sit on it last night! Most of all, HOW ABOUT 'DEM GAMECOCKS!!!! The Garnet & Black finally came out hot in a season opener, and beat up on a team they were supposed to beat up on.

Alright, let's cut the rah-rah shit, and put our fuckin pom-poms away! FUCK all that horse-whisperin' shit!!!!!! Here's what you do:

1) Go to your local deli, and call your bookie on the way.

2) Purchase 1/2 dozen bagels, I don't give a fuck what kind you get, just no Pumpernickel.

3) Buy a spread, but not just any spread. I don't want the butter for my beanbag, and I don't want the jelly for my joystick. I want one thing, and one fuckin thing only. FRESH FUCKIN NOVA FUCKIN SCOTIA LOXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!! Get the capers! Get the onions! Get the cream cheese! Get the finest fuckin freshest fuckin Nova Scotia LOX you can buy, and let's make that money!!! Here are six games that Uncle PMAC advises you.......BOOK IT!

Saturday 9/4 LOX (Home Teams In CAPS):

Connecticut (+2.5) @ MICHIGAN. The Prick Is Connecticut!

FRESNO ST. (-2.5) Vs. Cincinnati. The Prick Is Fresno St!

Missouri (-12) Vs. Illinois In St. Louis,MO. The Prick Is Missouri!

Kentucky @ LOUISVILLE (+3). The Prick Is Louisville!

Wisconsin (-20.5) @ UNLV. The Prick Is UNLV!

LSU (-6.5) Vs. North Carolina In Atlanta,GA. The Prick Is LSU!

(*Please Note, I Go By America's Line.*)