Free Agency Chutzpah!

Rumors are flying all over the fuckin place this morning, as there are reports of Chris "Lizard" Bosh and Dwayne "Bandaid" Wade teaming up for a game of grab-ass in Miami for years to come. I've been saying it since day one, I don't think there is any way Lebron plays alongside Wade in Miami. Chicago? That could be possible, but not Miami. South Beach is Wade's town, and it would be like A-Rod going to the Bronx to join Jeter and Co. Jeter is the captain, it's his team, it's his town. Loser Bosh finally got his head out of his fanny, and made a smart decision in not wanting to play in Cleveland!!! That's a pretty big slap in the face to the already shitty city. Let's not kid ourselves here, whenever you see a game nationally televised in Cleveland, the only cocksuckin fuckin outdoor aerial shots you get are of the Rock 'N Roll Hall Of Fame! WHO FUCKIN CARES??? I have a bigger skyline in my pants! My theory is that Lebron has really wanted to play with a big man this whole time, because he dominates the ball anyway. Mike D'Antoni turned Steve Nash into a 2-Time MVP, imagine what he could do with Lebron? That being said, Luke Ridnour and Raymond Felton are high on the Knicks wish list. Seriously though, they have been staying at Chris Simms's place! Carlos Boozer and Lebron had a falling out when Boozer left Cleveland years ago, and the NY Knicks have signed Amar'e Stoudamire. Something is brewing, and Joe Jerkoff will let the world know tomorrow night on ESPN.

How about Darko Milicic getting a 4-YR deal worth $20 Million from the Timberwolves?!?! What the fuck are these guys fuckin thinking? Four more years of Darko in the NBA? I rather watch "Avatar!" What about Chris Duhon? Four years and $15 Million from the Orlando Magic!!! WOW! This loser couldn't make a shot for a fuckin month! Ari Gold must be this guy's fuckin agent! Gimme a break! Enough is enough! I've had it with these cocksuckin teams in this cocksuckin league!!! Vinny Del Negro is heading to the Clippers! Why? Vinny Del Negro is about as cool as a Klondike Bar commercial! He sucks more prick than Carmella Bing! It's a big Wednesday, so stay tuned!