Giants Win The World Series!

You heard it here first, pricks! Please forgive me for picking the Giants in six games, and not five, what the fuck was I thinking!?! Congrats to the Giants fans on Faggot Avenue for winning their first World Series in 56 years. The Texas Rangers? Thanks for playing! How about the weak Giants lineup beating Cliff Lee twice in the World Series, while the Yankees and Tampa Bay Rays were dominated by the southpaw? That's baseball, Suzyn! Bengie Molina? He's happy, he still gets a ring! As a matter of fact, Molina decided to take part in the champagne celebration following the victory! He was jamming the bottles up his fat fuckin ass! Sit on this, Bengie! You little fuckin dog, you! Josh Hamilton? Thanks for showing up, pal! You're a loser versus Tampa and San Francisco, but all-world against the Yankees in the ALCS??? Gimme a fuckin break! Take a seat, Nolan Ryan! Go fuck yourself Chuck Greenberg! Pound sand, Jon Daniels! The ride is over!!!!!!!!!! Giants Win! Giants Win!

Giants Take Game 1!

The San Francisco Giants defeated Cliff "The Clit" Lee in Game 1 of the World Series last night at AT&T Park. Tim Lincecum hung tough despite not having his best stuff, while Lee floundered worse than a fish-o-filet sandwich from McDonald's. The rainbows were in full effect last night in McCovey Cove, and they paddled home more than gay! They were fuckin ecstatic! The San Francisco Giants haven't won a World Series since 1954, when they were the NY Giants! Imagine how long these fuckin flamers have been waiting to bring home a title?! A slugfest broke out by the bay, in what was expected to be a pitcher's duel. I guess I was fuckin wrong, but what do I know right? Look at me! I can't even go on the monkey bars anymore because my prick drags on the fuckin ground!!!

World Series 2010 Preview!

The 2010 Fall Classic begins tonight out in the city by the gay, er, bay. The San Francisco Giants take on the Texas Rangers in what should be a very evenly matched series. However, there's just one problem, not many people will be tuning in. PricksRus guarantees that this World Series will have the lowest tv ratings in MLB history. Why? A wise man once said, 'that's the way the cookie crumbles.' Tis' the nature of the beast, small markets equal even smaller ratings. I'm not saying these two teams don't deserve to be here, or that they suck, I'm just simply stating the sad reality of the American public when it comes to tuning into sporting events. Tim Lincecum squares off against Cliff Lee tonight in what should be an instant fuckin classic! Personally, I think there are plenty of great storylines for this particular series. The Texas Rangers and Ron Washington have become a national story, just take a look at Charlie Sheen's latest escapades! He was doing his best Ron Washington impression! Tim Lincecum? Nobody smokes more grass than this prick! What 2-Time Cy Young winner do you know that can get as baked as The Freak? Little Timmy runs around his mansion with nothing on, but oven mitts, and an apron that reads "Kiss The Prick" directly on his crotch! Hey Timmy! Is that a churro underneath your apron, or are you just happy to see me?!?! Brian Wilson? This prick doesn't just use Just For Men on his beard, he drinks it too! Josh Hamilton? What can I say, the guy loves a good bottle of Schweppes! In the words of the great Puff Daddy, "Pop Champagne Like We Won A Championship!" Buckle up, folks! It's gonna be a BUMPY ride!!! No pun intended!!!!!!

The PMAC Pick? Giants in 6 - BOOK IT!

Hey, Burnett! SIT!

Why the Yankees are starting A.J. Burnett tonight is beyond me. This fuckin creep hasn't pitched since October 2nd, and he went 10-15 on the year with a period-bloated 5.26ERA. It's like he hasn't been off the rag since mid-May! The Yankees are 7-7 in the seven 7-Game ALCS's they've played in which they have either led or trailed 2-1. The feeling in my prick tells me they will be 7-8, because Burnett has the zactly's. This means Burnett's breath smells exactly like my fuckin asshole! Girardi must SIT Burnett! Make him ride the fuckin pine! I don't give a fuckin fuck! I'm the kinda prick who would bench fuckin Santa Claus on Christmas Eve! Enough is enough already!!!

ALCS Game 3 Tonight!

Hey, Ron Washington! Tony Montana called, he wants his coke back! Sniff this, you fuckin prick! The ALCS is tied 1-1, and the series has shifted to the Bronx for the next three games. Clifford "The Pale Ghost" Lee takes the bump (no pun intended, Ron) tonight, and he'll be opposing Andy "Sweet & Dandy" Pettitte. Yes, folks, it's a battle of southern southpaws, and it should be an instant fuckin classic. Cliff Lee has become Mr. Postseason over the past two years, as he's now 6-0 with a 1.44 ERA for his career in the month of October, when the games truly matter. Andy Pettitte? He's had his share of postseason success as well, but tonight will undoubtedly be his biggest test yet.

Much speculation has been made of Cliff Lee's cap in recent days, as he has a large white spot on the bill of it. Yankees fans need not to worry about this, because it's just some blow. There is no resin or anything illegal on his hat. Nothing to see here, folks!!! Tune in tonight for Yankees-Rangers Game 3!

Rangers Advance To 1st Ever ALCS!

Some franchises take longer than others, but it's always well worth the wait. The Texas Rangers have won their first ever postseason series, and they will host the defending champion New York Yankees, Friday night, at the Ballpark in Arlington. The Rangers defeated the Tampa Bay Rays 5-1 last night, behind Cliff "Pale As A Prick" Lee. The only player in MLB more pale and stale than Cliff Lee is Jason Bay! How about Josh Hamilton? What the fuck was this guy doing during the champagne celebration? Pouring sparkling fuckin cider on himself facing the wall? How many lines of blow did Ron Washington do last night?!?! TBS analyst, Ron Darling, said prior to the game, "I was talking to Ron earlier, and he was fired up! He was already four inches off the ground!" Hmmm, interesting choice of words from Darling, who happens to be a Yale graduate! Either way, this will be an ALCS to remember...

Cya Twins!

CYA!!!!

Yankees Jump Ahead 2-0!

The New York Yankees have taken a 2-0 ALDS lead versus the Minnesota Twins. I'll see you in the Bronx on Saturday night, and let me tell you one fuckin thing - the place will be ROCKING...

Rangers Take 2-0 ALDS Series Lead!

The Texas Rangers have just taken a commanding 2-0 lead versus the Tampa Bay Rays, and are now heading west to Arlington for Game 3. Do I think this series is over? No. I can't count the Rays out until the fat bitch sings.

Happy Fuckin Halladay!

Congrats to Harry Leroy Halladay on throwing the first No-No in postseason play since Don Larsen's perfecto back in the 1956 World Series. If you don't like Roy Halladay, than your favorite fuckin sandwich is probably a filet 'o fuckin-fish! Halladay told Dusty "Disgusting" Baker and his group of period-stained-players to sit the fuck down all night! Have another cranberry juice, Dusty! The Doc came to play in his MLB postseason debut...